Why Do Japanese People Respond to Compliments with Humility?
In many Western cultures, the standard response to a compliment is a simple "Thank you." Accepting a compliment graciously is seen as a sign of confidence. However, if you compliment someone on their Japanese skills, you're very likely to hear a response like, 「いえいえ、まだまだです (Ie ie, mada mada desu)」, meaning "No, no, I still have a long way to go."
This act of deflecting or downplaying a compliment is a fundamental part of Japanese communication and is rooted in the cultural value of humility (謙遜 - kenson).
Instead of being a sign of low self-esteem, this response is a polite and culturally appropriate way of showing modesty. This guide will explain why this is done and teach you how to respond to compliments in a natural, Japanese way.
1. The Cultural Reason: The Virtue of Humility
In Japanese culture, humility is highly valued. Directly accepting a compliment can sometimes be perceived as arrogant or boastful. By deflecting the praise, you show that you don't consider yourself to be an expert and that you are always striving to improve. It's a way of maintaining harmony and showing respect to the person giving the compliment.
This doesn't mean you don't appreciate the compliment. The act of deflection is, in itself, a polite acknowledgment of the speaker's kind words.
2. Common Phrases for Responding to Compliments
Here are some of the most common ways to humbly deflect a compliment.
The Classic Response:
いえいえ、そんなことないです。
(Ie ie, sonna koto nai desu.)
"No, no, that's not true."
For Compliments on a Skill (like language):
いいえ、まだまだです。
(Iie, mada mada desu.)
"No, I still have a long way to go."
A More Formal/Polite Version:
とんでもないです。恐縮です。
(Tondemonai desu. Kyōshuku desu.)
"Not at all. I'm flattered." (Kyōshuku implies you feel humbled or almost embarrassed by the high praise).
3. Combining Humility with Gratitude
It's also very common and natural to follow up your humble deflection with a word of thanks. This shows that you appreciate the sentiment, even if you are not accepting the praise itself.
Compliment: 日本語がお上手ですね！ (Nihongo ga o-jōzu desu ne!) - Your Japanese is very good!
A Great Response:
いえいえ、まだまだです。でも、そう言っていただけると嬉しいです。ありがとうございます。
(Ie ie, mada mada desu. Demo, sō itte itadakeru to ureshii desu. Arigatō gozaimasu.)
"No, no, I have a long way to go. But I'm happy that you would say so. Thank you very much."
This response is perfect because it hits all the right notes: humility, gratitude, and happiness.
Conclusion
Responding to compliments in Japanese is a delicate cultural dance. While simply saying 「ありがとうございます (arigatō gozaimasu)」 is not necessarily wrong, especially for a foreigner, learning to use humble phrases like 「そんなことないです」 will make you sound much more fluent and culturally aware.
Remember the formula: deflect first, then express gratitude. This humble approach is the key to accepting compliments gracefully in Japan.